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Foster Chihuahua Sarah was just getting the hang of the idea that when you eliminate outside, you get a treat, and when you do it inside, you don't. So we were out on a walk, and since she's not the marking type, she wasn't getting a whole lot of treats, whereas her colleagues Theresa and Sophia were peeing everywhere and getting rewarded accordingly. Then the lightbulb went off over Sarah's head, and she proceeded to do a fake pee. It was so shamelessly and blatantly phony—she "assumed the position" for a split second and popped back up much too quickly even to have squeezed out one drop. I laughed and laughed and gave her a treat. When dogs lie, it's just so darned cute!
As an aside, you may be wondering how I have managed to keep my house clean over the past two years with so many foster dogs who started out not housetrained. I know some people swear by carpet cleaners, but I've never owned one. When I got my first foster dog, a large, gorgeous, but emaciated and debilitated German shepherd named Bella, I had baby blue wall-to-wall carpeting (not my choice—it came with the house). Of course, it was doomed. It was already looking shabby from the day-to-day wear and tear by my three big dogs and me. But I was not going to shove poor Bella into a crate—she had already suffered enough at the hands of her previous owner. By the time Bella was gone, after only three weeks, my house was literally reeking of urine. No amount of my usually stalwart Nature’s Miracle enzymes had been able to keep up with her bladder.
So one night, a good friend of mine came over and showed me how to rip carpet out. It wasn’t rocket science, but it was more complicated than I thought it would be because there were these thin strips of wood with sharp little carpet tacks poking up out of them all along the perimeter of the rooms. It took a crowbar and hammer to get those out. And then there were staples too. But once you got the hang of it, it was pretty easy. I thought I would hate not having wall-to-wall carpeting—I thought I would feel cold in the winter—but I really love it! It’s so much cleaner and neater.
It turned out that I had hardwood flooring under half of the carpeting and some kind of icky plywood under the other half. So I put linoleum tile down in the plywood section, and that wasn’t hard, either (I used the peel-and-stick kind). The only hard part was moving heavy furniture around. Now I have scatter rugs with rubber backing throughout the house, and if someone pees on one of them, into the washing machine it goes. Then once a week, I mop the floors. Nothing could be simpler, really.
But anyway, back to the subject at hand—canine deception. My late husky, Darby, was a master at fibbing. Oh, he was good. He had to be, because he always felt like "low man on the totem pole." Once, when I was sitting on the bed with my other two dogs and he wanted to get up on the bed, too, but didn't feel comfortable doing so because of them, he ran to the door of the bedroom barking and pretending that an intruder was coming. Naturally, the other two dogs jumped off the bed and ran to see what was up, at which point, Darby made a beeline for the bed. It was so blatant! I couldn't stop laughing.
Another time, I had gotten a new type of doggie door and was trying to train my elderly cocker spaniel to go through it. The two big dogs, Darby and Shandy, breezed back and forth through it with no problem whatsoever, but little Rogan was having a senior moment. So I kept encouraging him and offering him treats and praising him when he finally went through. Darby took note of this, went back outside, and stood there in front of the doggie door whimpering, pretending that he, too, was having difficulty.
Dogs may never lie about love, but all other topics seem to be fair game!




Comments ( 10 )
My dog loves to trick me too! We have a doggie door and she hates to go outside when it rains, but she knows she gets a treat when she does.. so she makes the doggie dog flap and make the noise and then runs up to me and stares at me until I see her and give her a treat. She also does it if she comes in from going and I didn't notice. She will go back outside for a second and then run in over and over again until she gets a treat! HAHA!
>>>KP's Response:
OMG, Lauren! That is too cute for words! :)
What a smart pooch you have!
KP
Posted by Lauren | January 14, 2008 9:10 PM
Posted on January 14, 2008 21:10
Ha! Our oldest dog fakes our younger dogs out all the time with the old "barking at an intruder" trick, then he takes the spot on the sofa or the toy he wants, he doesn't get it for long but still pretty sneaky!
Posted by Karen | January 15, 2008 2:26 PM
Posted on January 15, 2008 14:26
Once when I was visiting a family of four with a 10 month old Mastino dog I witnessed a fine bit of acting too. There was only one big comfy chair in the room, and two sofas filled with people so the dog very specifically told the Dad (who was in that chair, coincedence? nope!) that he really, really NOW needed to go out and relieve himself. He waited in front of the chair until the Dad had turned a corner to get the leash and then with the happiest and most content face settled himself smack in the middle of the best seat in the house. He was soooo pleased with himself we fell of the sofas laughing - and even more when Dad came back in!
Posted by Jessica | January 15, 2008 5:18 PM
Posted on January 15, 2008 17:18
I too had a dog, a Belgian Malinois that did the "bark at nothing to get the others off the couch" but he also did one better... I had taken him to our doggie beach with friend and her 2 dogs... we were the only ones there... well my dog chased her dog out into the surf when suddenly her dog stopped and my poor Zeke went nose first into his rear end and somehow ended up under the water.. my friend and I saw this is nearly died laughing at Zeke's plight.. so what does my sweet boy do ? he comes out of the water limping... of course my friend was all into cuddling and fawning over my poor "injured" boy... sure enough, not 5 minutes later he was off running after her dogs again perfectly fine !! I knew he was faking, all because we were lauging at him and he didn't appreciate it.. (PS I did check his "injured" foot just to make sure)
Posted by Sharon | January 17, 2008 6:01 PM
Posted on January 17, 2008 18:01
We had an Akita that used to run away all the time. My husband used to find him and bring him back, so to get even, he would go to the sliding door to ask him to let him out to the yard to do his thing. When my husband would get up and open the door for him, he would start dancing in circles and barking like saying haha!!! I don't need to go, just made you get up from your comfortable couch!!!!!!
Posted by Silvia Keller | January 18, 2008 3:03 AM
Posted on January 18, 2008 03:03
This reminds me of 2 Dachshunds - Lucky & Dutchess - who owned me (they are both at the bridge now). Dutchess was a puppy and Lucky was about 5 yrs. old. When I would feed them, Lucky would gobble his food and take off barking like crazy, and Dutchess had to run to see what all the excitement was about. Lucky would rush back to Dutchess's bowl and polish off all her food. It was too funny for me to scold him. They both lived a long and happy life with me.
Posted by Linda | January 19, 2008 3:04 PM
Posted on January 19, 2008 15:04
Great post !!!! I laughed with all the stories. Thanks for sharing :-)
Posted by Laura | January 23, 2008 10:00 AM
Posted on January 23, 2008 10:00
When my family lived in my old house we had 3 great danes. One very old one and two sister we had gotten. We had low fences so we had to teach the two youngest not to jump the fence and run off. Of course after one of our dogs learned that when we let them out and they didnt jump the fence theyd get a treat,and when she did get a treat shed get scolded she began running and circling the yard until her sister would follow. After she was sure her sister was following her shed run straight towards the fence and stop just short of it, mean while her sister would leap over it and go running down the street. She would come romping up to the back door and sit waiting for her treat completely content with herself after fooling her sister. This isnt exactly Dog fooling owner but I always found it just as humorous.
Posted by Alex | February 5, 2008 8:09 PM
Posted on February 5, 2008 20:09
hello my name is leeanne and i am sad to say i have to get rid of my lovely dog she only 9 months old and the reason why i have to get rid of her because my nan who which i live with at this time as gotten sick over having her i don't want to give her up so i am trying to find a place where i can go vist her everyday and hopely get her back as soon i get my own place i love her more than you know so anyone can help me out my no is 01438 743506
Posted by leeanne | February 18, 2008 9:18 AM
Posted on February 18, 2008 09:18
hi it me again i forgot to say in my other message is that i only got to friday this friday to do something about it so please could one of you please contack me 01438 743 506
Posted by leeanne | February 18, 2008 9:21 AM
Posted on February 18, 2008 09:21